Dead Crows In Boston

[Tom Neitzel]

Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.

However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.

The scientific conclusion was that while all the lookout crows could say "Cah", none could say "Truck."

[Paul Okarma]

 ;D

It is really weird up here.  My wife just sent me the following:

Boston:  3rd angriest city

Boston anger is a combination of things: sports fandom that goes well past obsession, fickle and unpredictable five month bone-chilling winters, a population of people heavily associated with pugilist Ireland, an insecurity stemming from constant self-evaluation against New York, horrible traffic on the Pike, 93, 95, Storrow, and beyond, a sizable population of college students who only use the town’s dazzling public spaces as a receptacle for vomit and urine, and an irrational cannoli rivalry (the answer is Mike’s dammit).

It highlights two things I always say.

1.  People up here are unusually obsessed with the Red Sox and Patriots.  Way past being a typical sports fan.  They think it's actually very important in their life.  You see a lot of mentions of "lifelong (team name) fan" in obituaries.

2.  They have an incredible obsession and inferiority complex towards all things New York.

People up here are really strange.

[Claudia Killebrew]

;D

It is really weird up here.  My wife just sent me the following:

Boston:  3rd angriest city

Boston anger is a combination of things: sports fandom that goes well past obsession, fickle and unpredictable five month bone-chilling winters, a population of people heavily associated with pugilist Ireland, an insecurity stemming from constant self-evaluation against New York, horrible traffic on the Pike, 93, 95, Storrow, and beyond, a sizable population of college students who only use the town’s dazzling public spaces as a receptacle for vomit and urine, and an irrational cannoli rivalry (the answer is Mike’s dammit).

It highlights two things I always say.

1.  People up here are unusually obsessed with the Red Sox and Patriots.  Way past being a typical sports fan.  They think it's actually very important in their life.  You see a lot of mentions of "lifelong (team name) fan" in obituaries.

2.  They have an incredible obsession and inferiority complex towards all things New York.

People up here are really strange.

As well they should. We New Yorkers are soooo much better. ;)

[Valerie Johnson]

MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The obvious things would be

1. truck drivers do not swerve or brake to avoid birds
2. trucks are generally much higher and wider than cars and birds in my experience wait until the last possible minute to fly out of the way so are more likely to be hit by the higher/wider truck
3.Some highways have more truck traffic than car traffic

[Valerie Johnson]

As well they should. We New Yorkers are soooo much better.

Hmmmm...opinions vary :o

[Jim Glatthaar]

As well they should. We New Yorkers are soooo much better.

Hmmmm...opinions vary :o

Not so much.

[Cheryl Watson]

Tom....

Laugh of the Day!!

 ;D ;D ;D ;D

[Valerie Johnson]

Not so much.

Like I said...opinions vary ;D

[Jim Glatthaar]

Not so much.

Like I said...opinions vary ;D

And as the French say "Au contraire"

[Valerie Johnson]

Obviously opinions do vary...yours versus mine ;D

[C. B. Williams]

Ha, Cah, with a Boston accent. funny.